First Date Faux PasWe all know first dates are stressful, and no one wants a list of do's and don'ts looming over his head while
trying to make a good impression. But in a time when dating has become as competitive as the Summer Olympics, its wise to approach a first date with
caution.
No amount of information is too much when you're looking to snag that special someone. And while any creative or thoughtful idea you might have for a
first date goes a long way to winning that someone's heart, the wrong move on a first date might just as easily crush it.
When planning that memorable first outing, avoid a few classic mistakes that run the risk of dooming a relationship before it's even begun.
Never assume one of you is paying:
Logically speaking, the one who does the asking should do the paying. But in these equal opportunity/equal treatment times, bill splitting (or
going dutch) has become increasingly common. How embarrassed would you be asking your date to spot you for next time?
Never suggest meeting friends or family:
OK, so the first date went better than expected. Cap it off with a kiss - hell, break
in the backseat for a half-hour. But do not, under any circumstances, cap off a first date with a surprise visit to meet your best friend, sibling
or (and this is the worst) mom and dad. Talk about pressure, and besides - unless you're in the market for 24-hour shotgun wedding a la Britney Spears,
why not just wait until things get serious.
Never spring a surprise date on someone you barely know:
In general, it's best to know a person's likes and dislikes before you
go planning some extravagant first date. Fish eggs aren't for everybody, so don't plan to wine and dine with caviar if you haven't asked first.
Likewise, a kayaking voyage with a non-swimmer, a mountain hike with someone who's afraid of heights or a foreign film with a date who is prone to
migraines can all spell disaster.
Never talk just to keep the conversation going:
With rare exception (like those sickening "love at first sight" moments),
first dates are filled with awkward moments and silences. It's a given. There is nothing worse than someone who talks just to hear the sound of their
own voice. Unless something really interesting happened at work, don't talk about your day. No one wants to hear about mom's gallbladder surgery or
dad's miraculous rebound on the fifteenth hole. Keep the conversation interesting. If you're getting yawns from across the table, it's best to change
the subject.
Never fib to make yourself look better:
This is sound advice for any date, but first dates are when people's ears perk up - if they
like you, they'll remember every last thing you say. On the flip side, you'll be so nervous, you wont remember a damn thing you've said and, chances are,
if you're fibbing about something that isn't too terribly important in the first place, you'll contradict yourself later.
And for that matter, never fib about . :
According to Men's Health magazine, 37-percent of American men lie about the size of
their - well, you know. Should your relationship progress to an intimate place, any idiot who isn't suffering from Cataracts or a serious depth perception
problem is going to figure it out. And what's more embarrassing than being caught in that lie?
Never sneak sex into a conversation:
If you're both feeling it, odds are the sex will happen when it's meant to. But sneaking hints
and sexual suggestions into "getting to know you" banter isn't sexy - it's desperate. If all you're looking for is a quickie, head to the local bar,
zero in on your prey and make your move. If you want something more, lines like "why don't you come up to my place for some coffee and we'll see what
happens" won't likely land you a second date.