The Definition of Chat
Without question, the subject on the back of everybody's mind as their chat progresses is, 'When are we gonna take
this to the next level'?
No necessarily a date or anything sexual-the next level, meaning up and out of the chat room and on to something a
little more personal.
Chats can progress in a variety of ways. Depending on the subject matter, you might stay in a chat room shooting the shit
for hours and take your convo straight to the phone. Maybe your progression is slower-chat room gives way to IM, which leads
into texting and ultimately, after weeks of that odd/cute version of courting the online world seems to have perfected, a
phone call.
No one way is right, but at the very least, as things progress, it's helpful to know what the various stages of chat move for
your blossoming "relationship." Take a look at what we think your chat phases say about you.
But it doesn't have to be that way-even, shocked to say, when you're meeting people online.
Chat Room
If you're sharing a dialogue, kudos-at least you know there's interest there! What you're talking about may determine
what comes next. If your chat is vague (name, age, interests, casual banter about the goings on of the world), you might
stay within the walls of said chat room for a while. If talk turns to what you're looking for in a relationship, past
relationships that have brought you to this point-all the topics people bring up when they're looking to find out more
about you-then you're likely going to step into a new medium, be it Web Chat, Instant Message or the always entertaining
cell phone.
Web Cam
I feel like we're drafting up a new 'Choose Your Own Adventure' novel. "Let's say he flips the page and goes here next."
But really, a person's preferred method of chat does say a lot about him. The Web Cam-a tool that can be used in so many ways.
Why kid ourselves and pretend there's nothing sexual about it-why else would so many adult sites use Web cams for live streaming
video. That said, not everyone who asks you to turn on your cam for a quick chat is looking for sex. Sometimes it's a way to
see what the other person looks like with the safety of computer screens separating you. Sometimes, it's intended to make a
conversation that much more personal. Just be sure you know the other persons intentions before flipping that switch.
Another Profile
This is an interesting one, and in the interest of full disclosure, this is usually my next question after meeting someone in a
chat room. Do you have another profile? Why? Depending on where you guys meet, some Websites aren't designed for you to lay your
personality out on the table. Sites like MegaMates are much more inclined to let your personality shine through. Someone asking
to see another profile is their way of saying, 'I want to know more about you.' Take the compliment and send them the link. With
any luck, it will lead into a more advanced method of chat.
Instant Message
This is perhaps the most common next step. Why? Because it just seems to be the way people communicate these days. And if
someone is asking for your instant messaging , it could mean a couple of things. Truth be told, it could be as blunt as they
hate chat rooms because they never seem to be in sync with their browser. More likely, they've found someone they're interested
in chatting with (that would be you) and don't see the need to beat around the bush and longer and continue seeking out
interesting people. If you make it this far, now's the time to let your personality shine-don't be afraid to chat about whatever
pops into your mind.
Texting
Some would call this the precursor to the phone call, but in a text happy era-one filled with Blackberries and iPhones
and Cue's, oh my-getting a text might be one of the most intimate forms of chat out there. One thing is certain-if they
go so far as to pop the question (in this case, 'What are your digits'?), you can pretty much guarantee they like what
they've seen and heard so far. This is your opportunity to get a bit flirty and tempt them. Into what, you might ask?
Into calling you, of course. Which means.
The Phone Call
Yeah, you've graduated. Verbal communication, baby-it's what makes the world go round. Now before you freak
out ('I'm not good at talking to people'; 'I don't know what to say'), rest assured-if you're talking on the phone,
and you've done the chat room, the instant message, maybe even some light texting-you've done everything right so
far. What do you have to lose? Take a deep breath, take the call and, above all else, be yourself-you have absolutely
nothing to lose. Worst case scenario-the spark dies out. Have you really lost anything (if you talk after 9pm, most
cell calls are free so you've really lost nothing)? Best case scenario, your interest is further piqued, giving way to.
The In Person Meet
Do you see what we have to go through to get a date these days? Circus o' rings, no? Fear not-all your hard work
has not been without purpose. Gone are the days when your first date has to be filled with awkward pauses, strange
bouts of silence and a few more trips to the bathroom than any one person takes during a meal. You've been there,
done that. If you're really made your way through the chat circuit, then you already know a thing or two about each
other. Use that. Take mental note of facts and tidbits that stood out during your conversations and use those as a
way to find out more. Dates should be fun-chat culture has just made it easier to eliminate some of the stress in
the process.
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