True, getting the digits is half the battle, but the key word there is half - the war ain't over yet.
What good is a number if you don't know what to do with it?
Do you call right away, wait the obligatory two days, never call? What exactly is the protocol for giving someone a ring on the line?
Imagine this scenario, if you will: Boy meets girl in a bar. He thinks she's hot. She thinks he's hot. They grab a couple of beers,
maybe play a round of darts, and then the ladies friends want to call it a night. Boy busts out his cell phone, asks for her digits,
plugs the numbers in and hits send, just to make sure she's got his number too. And then, boy and girl go their separate ways.
Now what?
If this were a quirky romantic comedy, boy would dial up girl two minutes later with some adorably cheesy line like, "Is this
later enough for you?," and the audience would "oooooh" and "aaaaah", everyone would get a good smile in
and that would be that.
But as we in the dating world know, it's not always quite so simple. But what if it could be?
Something to remember while you hold that phone in your hands, sweaty palms and all, staring at the clock and debating whether
or not to hit send. If the number was given to you voluntarily, what do you have to worry about? The only way you could possibly
look like an asshole is by not calling at all.
Still, there is an art to it. If you're going to ring someone two minutes after they've left your side, you'd better damn well
have a corny or genuine line that's going to leave 'em speechless. Sure, it can be done, but if you aren't prepared, you're
going to come off looking a little desperate.
Your best bet is to wait until the next day. Give it a bit of breathing room - just enough time for them to sweat it out a little
bit in anticipation, not so long that they're over it and blow you off. Forget about "the rules." People who wait three,
four days (a week or two, in some cases) just come off like ass holes. If you think it's going to be a while before you call, maybe
because work is nuts or you're going out of town, say so when you take the number. Otherwise, there's no excuse for flatly not
calling. No one is so busy they don't have time for a two minute "hey there."
To text or not to text? How bout not! That's something you save for when you've been dating a few and you know the other person
actually reads and responds to those things. I, for one, just figured out the text feature on my phone last month, and I had a
message from someone I thought had fallen off the face of the earth who was "dying" to get together. Um, if they wanted
to hang out so bad, they could have called.
Same goes for e-mails, AIM . sure, if you happen upon this person on line, say hey, how ya doing?. But nothing beats hearing a voice
first person. It's an extra bit of effort that will pay off in the end.
So what do you say when you call? I preach being direct. If you want a date, make a suggestion (dinner, drinks, coffee, the park) and
suggest a few dates (such as: "I'm free next week except Tuesday and Thursday, and most of next weekend, so whatever works best
for you!"). That way the purpose of your call isn't so vague and left up in the air.
And finally, the golden rule. LEAVE YOUR NUMBER!Anything can happen in the age of modern technology (or, let's face it, after a couple
of drinks). Whether they forgot to hit save after typing in your number or they forgot your name (but really liked you) after four cosmos,
it's generally a good idea to leave your digits every time you call someone.
And on the off chance you never get a call back, move on. Don't dwell on it. There could be any number of explanations why your call
never got returned, so why fixate on the one reason that makes you feel bad. There are thousands of fish in the sea. So get back on
your game, hit the town and find another number.
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